Good news, I'm ok. Bad news...(CAUTION: I need mature readers for this one)

I need surgery. Ok, here's the story. For a while, I've been suspecting there has been something wrong with me. More to the point, I've been thinking there is something wrong with my penis. I'm not really too worried about the size but more on the tip and the foreskin.

For those who don't know, the tip is also know as the head of the penis and the foreskin is the skin that covers it when one doesn't have an erection, or while in resting position. When a male does have an erection, the tip/head will be pushed out of the forskin and emerge. This is how a regular penis works. However, in order to get it to where the penis tip can come out, while growing up, the boy must pull it out on his own. It begins when you are a baby. You mother, or whom ever changes your diaper, will try and pull the tip out to clean. When you get older you are usually told to do this on your own from your parents.

Those whom aren't like this are circumcized. If you don't know if you're circumcised or not, here's a simple lesson on how you can tell if you're circumcized or not. As I've mentioned before, the normal penis has its head behind the foreskin until an erection. But if you can see your penis tip, without having an erection, then you are circumcised. Chances are, you had it right after birth. This can go into a debate about the religious and ethinic problems and praise about circumcision so I won't go into. However, for the most part, white people tend to have their children circumcised more often then not.

Now, here's my problem. When I was born, my mother opted to not have me circumcised while I was baby. Because of this, the doctors told her that when she was changing my diaper, or while I was taking a bath, that she should push the foreskin back to make it easier to push back on my own when I get older. Despite being told this, she didn't do such. The reason? She didn't feel right messing with a babies penis. First bad move.

Now while I was growing up, my mother nor my father never told me to pull the foreskin back while taking a bath to clean my penis. My mother once told me in the seventh grade to wash it with soap and water but other then that, nothing else. So, throughout middle school, and eventually High School, I went on oblivious on this subject. Even in health class, the subject never came up. Second bad move.

However, even before now, I suspected something amiss. Reason being, my penis didn't look like other guys penis like the ones I saw in porn. Not the size but formation. I didn't have the tip. During this summer, with little else to do, I decided to research on my aliment. A bit of shock came upon me. My suspensions were true. Not only was there something wrong with my penis but it had a term. Phimosis. This is an aliment of sorts where the head of the penis has trouble coming out of the foreskin. Apparently, you're suppose to be able to pull the head out by the age of 16. I'm 18. Not a good sign. Another thing is that surprisingly enough, my dad also had this before my mom and him had sex for the first time. In his case, the foreskin was forced back when he first entered my mother's vagina which caused him pain and to bleed. My mother would never know what the problem was until I told her about myself. She put 2 and 2 together.

Now back to my problem. Since I couldn't retract the foreskin back, and was 18, I was recommended to a Urologist, a doctor who focuses on the urinary tracts of men and women and reproductive system of men. Once I got there, and finally met the doctor, I was promptly asked to take down my pants for examination. There, the doctor tried to push my foreskin back himself. Once he couldn't, he asked me to try. I got it further back then usual but couldn't pull it back. So, rather then take a non-surgical approach, he told me that I needed a circumcision. He told me I did in fact have Phimosis and that at my age I would need a circumcision.

There in lies the problem. I don't have insurance so a surgery, as this is considered a surgery at my age, would be rather costly. A rough estimate would be around $1500USD. I don't have that kind of money. However, the Urologist did recommend me going to a place where they would do my operation but cut the cost significantly. So next week, I'm going to see if I can arrange an operation, first seeing how much they will cut off from the price and how much we will have to pay and then how long the recovery time will be. Ugh...My life just got a little bit more complicated.